Kalau Saya jadi PM.....

Kalau saya jadi PM - Inspired by Siti Rahayu Baharin! credit to my super crazy imagination!

Kalau Ruzielah jadi Perdana Menteri.....

• Pn. Siti Rahayu Bahrin akan saya lantik sebagai Penasihat Politik saya sebab dia dah ada Master in Political Science, dia juga boleh berbahsa inggeris dalam slank Americanya dengan baik, saya berharap dia akan dapat menasihati saya cara terbaik untuk mengajar Presiden US menghormati Islam.
• Pn. Anggun akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri di Jabatan Perdana Menteri kerana dia mempunyai sifat yang sedikit sama seperti menteri yang ada sekarang, sungguh berani dan lancang berkata kata.
• Pn. Raihanie Ngarega akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Pengangkutan :P (sila marah jika mahu) kamu tidak dilantik menjadi Menteri belia dan sukan kerana kamu hanya tahu berenang.
  
• Pn. Syaffina Shahrom akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Pelancongan kerana dia suka melancong dan membezakan harga tiket kapal terbang yang berpatutan. Dia juga mampu berkomunikasi dalam pelbagai bahasa Inggeris, Bahasa Melayu, Jawa, Rawa dan Perak. :P
  
• Pn. Amoi Azirah akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Pembangunan Keluarga, wanita dan Masyarakat kerana dia mempunyai sofat yang penyayang pada suami keluarga dan bibik2
  
• Cik Intan Farrah akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Pertahan kerana dia mempunyai pengalaman dalam bidang bela diri (bersilat)
• Pn. Syarim Irwani akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Perdagangan antarabangsa dan Industri kerana dia mempunyai pengalaman yang luas dalam bidang perdagangan antarabangsa, beliau juga telah menjalinkan hubungan yang erat dengan pengusaha dan pengedar barangan berjenama antarabangsa
• Pn. Sharifah Najiha akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Kesihatan kerana dia selalu sabar dan tegar menjaga pesakit-pesakit di sekelilingnya.
  
• Cik Syikah Ahmad akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Penerangan, Komunikasi dan Kebudayaan kerana dia masih bujang (ada kaitankah?) dan tahu menari dan bermain alat muzik tradisional serta bijak berkomunikasi.
• Pn Nadya Abd Rahman akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Sumber Manusia tanpa alasan yang kukuh (saya bersifat pilih kasih semua kawan2 wajib diberi kedudukan!)
• Pn. Nyonya Mansur akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Kemajuan Luar Bandar dan Wilayah kerana dia orangnya yang sangat humble serta memahami situasi dan keperluan Masyarakat luar Bandar dalam panganya yang tersendiri
• Pn Kuhen akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Pengajian Tinggi kerana pengalamanya yang meluas dalam bidang tersebut serta dia juga meruapakan calon yang tegas dan berdedikasi
• Pn. Siti Aminah akan saya lantik sebagai Menteri Sumber Asli dan Alam Sekitar kerana beliau arif tentang cara menggunakan sumber asli dengan baik, beliau telah dapat menghasilkan daun kunyit yang sihat dan besar dari saiz biasa dengan hanya menggunakan najis haiwan.

namun saya masih lagi mempunyai bebrapa jawatan yang masih belum diisi kerana saya tidak mempunyai calon yang berwibawa yang saya benar-benar kenal jiwa raganya. bersama kita membangun negara.

P/S : DON'T TAKE IT SERIOUSLY!

Manual ME....

As every(thing)s comes with manual, therefore i think we should all comes we manual to avoid misunderstanding, misconception, embarrassment and also to avoid awkward situation so here you are - Ruzielah 1981 upgrade to 2011 manual.

1. I am married with two kids
   
2. I am nice. I am not pretending to be nice. I am just nice. end of the story. (define nice!)
3. I am funny. Yes i am. so please mind the stupid jokes. Love it or hate it at your own risk.
4. I suck at sport. any kind of sport! so Please do not invite me to any atletic activity.
   
5. I am truely and genuinely seriously low maintainance. Unless for any good reason. I dont get jealous or upset if you wear prada, Salvatore Ferragamo, Gucci or LV.
6. I never like horror movie. exception for Hantu Kak Limah Balik ke Rumah.
7. I have the most crazy imagination. I frequently imagine the scenario that i wish can goes differently. Whooopppppp!
   
8. I enjoy casual conversation with strangers. p/s : female and old folks only :)
9. I hate flowers.
10. I love the colors of green.
11. friends I have are the dearest things in the entire world to me.
12. I love babies and children so much
13. I am a good friend if you are a good friend.
14. I can sense pretenders and Miss or Mr. Two Face
15. I express my feeling outloud most of the time. -maaf jika menyakitkan hati kamu-kamu
16. I believe everybody deserve a second chance. (Forgiveness is the best way)
17. Gifts make me feel awkward. I’d have to be incredibly comfortable with you to feel okay about receiving a gift
18. I don’t like being treated like I’m dumb. I do stupid crap sometimes. I’ll be the first to laugh about it when I do stupid crap. But please don’t treat me like I’m a moron. :P
19. I love to read books. (hinthinthint but please refer to number 17)
20. I appreciate sincerity and a true friendship.
21. I am not afraid of cockroaches, cicak, cacing umpan pancing dan sejenisnya butI'm afraid of cats! :P -maaf jika saya terjerit dan meniggalkan makanan saya!
22. Once we’re friends, I’ll go to the end of the earth to make your life better!
23. I know this post is kind of "poyo" but seriously what a blog for!

I think everyone should comes with her or his instruction and manual! because you know yourself better than others and you'll never know when a self manual can be sooo handy :P

simply "anu"

Anu? cuba describe apa makna kalimah anu pada pandangan anda? sebagai anak jati Johor, selain perkataan "ek" perkataan "anu" adalah ungkapan atau ayat yang selalu disebut dalam hampir setiap ayat, tapi as dah terjadi orang KL sangat lama akak tak gunakanya. Last week akak balik JB nak tegelak pulak bila Pak Chik Amna a.k.a my brother tanya kat Amna "sapa anu amna ni?" pastu Pak Uda pulak tanya (My brother also) "abang raeez anu amna ke?" amna pun jadi pelik sebab konfius nak define "anu". "anu dalam konteks ni ialah "buat" kedua2 meereka nak tanya sapa buat amna, tapi disebabkan otak tak dapat mengeluarkan pekataan buat so pekataan "anu" digantikan.

Antara manusia yang paling suka menggunakan pekataan anu ialah nenek saya Pn Fadhlon (glamer kan nama dia) dia suka suruh orang isi tempat kosong dengan memahami "anu" yang dia maksudkan, anatarnya nenek suka cakap :-

• "kau dah suruh dah dia anu baju kau?"
• "tadi nek jumpa anu tu dia nak pegi anu, lama juga dia pergi"
• "anu tu, tadi dia uang bagi kuih ni"
• "beli gula sebungkus, tepung, lada 50 se dengan anu 2 ringgit"

kat Johor perkataan anu bisanya digunakan merujuk kepada perkara2 yang kita susah nak orally define, bendanya ada di kepala tapi mulut tak dapat lafazkan, so anu boleh jadi apa sahaja tidak terbatas kepada orang atau benda.

So be prepare kalau nak bekeluarga dengan orang Johor mungkin anda adalah "anu" yang dimaksudkan.

P/S : BM saya A1 masa SPM dan saya merasa skema sekarang.

Happy Friday Friends!.

There are a few wishes that i have listed for you my dear friends and haters!

1. I wish for you to eat something delicious
2. I wish your kids will kiss you on your cheeck and say " i love you soo much mommy"( Raeez normally said "Saaaayang ibu banyak sangat besar macam cloud")
3. I wish that you’ll give-and-receive a great hug.
4. I wish an old long lost friend will come to you and said "you looking good"
5. I wish you will get a great big laugh from something very funny and suprising
6. I wish you can leave some comments on my blog (haha)
7. I wish you can settle all your PTPTN or study loan ASAP (insaff!)
   
8. I wish you can enjoy your weekends with the love one.
9. i wish you to perform your solat on time (insafff juga!)
   
10. I wish you can forgive someone today and feel good about it.
11. i wish you can vanish all cicak, lipas, nyamuk in your house so you can live happily ever after
12. I wish you can fart in public without nobody notice...
13. I wish you to fall in love with your partner forever.
14. I wish you to feel good about yourself regardless of the critics.
15. I wish you to still uphold to your principles.
16. I wish you to be able to cook your family favourite menu's!
17. I wish you to still remember the good old time memories you spend with your parents and family
18. I wish for you to have a great food massage.
19. I wish you manage to buy something that you want for so long
20. I wish and pray to Allah that He forgives the wrong that we do.
    

P/S : I love you!

Dear Anonymous

1. You have always try to be nice to me, but i dont have to like you. You are not a good person.
2. I am polite to you because you are my my )(*& but i dont trust you even a little bit.
3. I know each and every step of your plan and am just pretending stupid
4. You are a good mother and i hope you realize that....
5. We been talking about your physical look more than before and we give name to each one of you too.
   
6. If you keep telling people that you know everything. try public speaking!
7. Pretending that your son doesn’t have any problems is hurting, not helping, him.
8. If you think commenting on somebody weight as a good way to start the conversation, you are wrong!
9. You are beautiful enough to remind everybody you aren't beautiful, people use to get annoyed when a beautiful lady says she is not beautiful.
10. Please stop tagging me on facebook, i add you because i just like window online shopping, i can't afford to buy everything. (this message is execeptional for www.begcanteq.blogspot.com)
    
11. I know you can cook 876 menus, so what?
12. Please watch "Hantu kak Limah balik rumah" with me :) i'll love you more.
13. Spending a lot of money to your Alma Prada bag while you leaving in a Jet Flat is like showing the world that you are financially blonde!.....
    
14. oh oh i can hear you say i'm jealous, well....do i look like i care?
15. You are one of the important person in my life. I wish the best to you.
16. Can we celebrate 2011 mother's Day together?
17. If you want to be sexy make sure you are not fall under the category which people can obviously see you dark color cleavage, armpit or your selulit. That is so Gulppp! (menutup aurat kan lebih manis)
18. I hope that Allah will help you to find your way. I really care. yes i am.
19. Appreciate your wife people and stop flirting on Facebook!
20. I know you will hate me for this post. tapi ada kak limah kisah?

P/S : i love to be Malaysian!

Confession time....

1. 'm overweight.....
2. i hide some of my friend on facebook....
3. i'm so tired of two faced people....
4. i gossip more now....~this is not good, Mr. Andy once says : "can you just mind your own business z!"
5. I hate skinny jeans. Mostly because I will never have the body to wear them.
6. i hate nasi lemak....
7. mok'ku cafe makes me smell like tuna....
8. i hate my job....
9. i am demotivated....
10. i never watch and have zero interest over twilight....
11. i miss ronnie, amoi, naddu si gila, ayu, mas, ria, zana, jieha and all my gals so much!
12. i wish i can be a fulltime housewife!
13. i ate the whole jar of kuih semprit all by myself....thanks to my SIL....
14. Hearing someone use the words “dowh” or “tak boleh blah” aloud makes me want to punch myself in the ear repeatedly.
15. i think i can sing better than someone i know....hahahahhahahahahhaha...~WTF~
16. i hate IIUM new signage.......
17. i love my ex boyfriend (Mr. Andy) more and more now...
18. don't tell me that petai is gross, I will probably never forgive you for it.I find it horribly rude....
19. i wish i have the kiss-ass skills!
20. anything you need to confess lately?